I guess this is what happens when you post your weight for all to see. I was not going to respond to this, but I have to admit, it stung a little. I just read this comment regarding this post:
Anonymous said...
I'm sure you haven't thought about this, but is this really what you want your daughter to think is important? Heaven forbid she ever weigh more than 115 pounds! How do you think it would make her feel to know that wasn't good enough for her mother after having two children? Yes, it's important to show your children how to live a healthy lifestyle, but it's not always about what the scale reads. Also, you're obviously not posting this just for your records. No blog is just for your personal use. If you didn't want everyone to see it, you wouldn't post it on the web.
So, {mostly} politely in response:
Dear Anonymous,
Ouch. My, my we are feeling judgemental today, eh? Sheesh. I want to apologize for offending you or anyone else. I will say, because you are an "anonymous" reader, it makes me a little sad that maybe I know you and you are feeling this way. Or maybe I don't know you, which makes this bad enough. Either way, I prefer you post a name, even if it is fake...makes you less cowardly. I hope you don't get so sassy with all the blogs you stumble upon that don't fit into your moral code of ethics. It is truly unbecoming. Even with that said, I would not have even commented, but you DID question my mothering and to that I have to respond...that is just plain wrong!
1. I never ever ever said I would put pressure on my daughter to be 115 pounds! I am specifically talking about MY weight! I think she could care less in the future whether or not I lost the weight! If I were 200 pounds I would never blame my children for weight gain. Shame shame on you for suggesting that when you don't know me! How. Dare. You.
2. I think it is perfectly fine to cheer people on who want to lose baby weight! Do you not get excited for obese people to lose weight for health on "Biggest Loser"? Don't lie--we all do! They don't have to be my size, some people are heavier, and some are lighter! Who cares!!! NO ONE wants to weigh 40+ pounds more than they orginally did before they were pregnant. I don't care who you are--no one does. Plus, the purpose of this post was to encourage people to believe they CAN do it! I think it is a good way to show your children that you can work hard to achieve personal goals. You are right, the scale is irrelevant. My intent was never to make anyone feel bad about their weight, if that is what you are getting at. I think it is so normal to want to make an effort to lose baby weight in order to be a healthy mom and an attractive wife! You just plain feel better about yourself.
3. This IS my personal blog and I often post very very personal things on it. I DO get a blog book made once a year to document everything. This post was for my records. After I write a few more posts, it will be fogotten and archived. And I will make a book of it. I enjoy looking back at it. I documented my belly getting huge and loved it. I also love watching it shrink. I'm just cool like that, I guess.
4. I am a fitness professional. Some women spend their time scrapbooking. Cool. I spend my free time teaching other people to get in shape and have a blast doing it. What's the difference? It is something I am good at. People look at me for guidance in this capacity and I LOVE to help and see them get the results they want.
I guess that is all I wanted to say to you. I honestly would not care, but I hate that you judged my mothering. You have no idea how much I love my children and this has NOTHING to do with them. It was meant to be a fun and encouraging post--laughable that I put my weight out there for all to see. Sorry you are not as funny as me.
**my sincerest apologies to ANYONE who misread the weight post. I never wanted anyone to think that 115 pounds is standard! I was truly doing it for me, knowing that was my goal weight. I am sorry to come across the wrong way**
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53 comments:
Guurrrlll- I loved your post. I LOVED your honesty. I loved your determination and willpower to lose the baby weight. You are an inspiration to me and i know that whenever we do have kiddos that losing the weight can be done and you DO have time to workout. You rock and I am SO proud of you. You are one hot mama!
Amen!! Way to go to you for responding! It is so encouraging to mothers to know that you can go back to your old shape (or even better) after kiddos!
This is just silly and hypercritical. This person obviously doesn't know you at all, because if they did, they wouldn't criticize...not to mention if they've ever seen how truly petite you are in size, they wouldn't think 115 so crazy. Just silly...but good for you for sticking up for yourself!
Good for you Nicki! I thought your previous post was so encouraging. As someone trying to lose weight right now (haven't had kids but want to lose it before I get pregnant) your post was very encouraging. Thank you for being so honest!
Today when I walked into the Y, someone else who was coming in at the same time asked me if I was the girl who taught kickboxing. I said, "no, my friend Nicki does and thank you for thinking I look like her!" :)
You've worked hard. Don't feel bad about that. Anonymous posters never count. Gotta put your name to get counted as valid!
I never thought losing all the baby weight was possible until I did it. I never thought I could be in better shape than I was before kids... but I am :) So are you and that's awesome! Post all you want! Encourage people that they CAN! :)
For some reason I'm feeling very compelled to weigh in on this...
I have spent most of my life heavier than my peers. I clearly remember being called horrible names in middle school and feeling so bad about myself, my self esteem was and stayed in the toilet because of my looks. My family and friends have always been loving and supportive, it was everyone else. Over time the problem progressed until I tipped the scales at well over 200. In the past 6 months I have lost 60 pounds and still have a long way to go. All that being said, I know what it is like to feel like an outcast slob because clothes are big, slouchy, and entirely unflattering. I know how damaging that can be to the mind and spirit. We are our toughest critics! I think that teaching children to be healthy is what is most important and that society is embracing that concept more now than ever before. If I were to be entirely transparent, I would say that I started losing weight to be healthier and so that I may have healthier pregnancies...now I realize how hard I've worked and don't want to think about putting the pounds back on...even for pregnancy. Your post encouraged me to keep our family plan in tact and inspired that when that time comes, I do not have to fall prey to the "baby weight" game. I appreciate your passion for fitness and the lessons you are teaching your children (about everything)!
Girl...I love your honesty!! And, your blog always makes me smile! ...You are such a good momma!!! And, good for you for treating your body as a temple! If anything, THAT is what you are teaching your sweet baby girl!
Okay, I am "anonymous". I just want to say that it was not my intention to judge your ability as a mother. Your love for your children is obvious. As the child of a habitual dieter and someone who lives on the scale, it just struck me that I didn't want your daughter to grow up feeling the way I did. Even though I have always been fit and trim, it never seemed to be good enough. I just think our children (especially daughters) should see us embracing who we are. I apologize for hurting your feelings.
Even though you don't know me, I have been reading your blog for a while(I found you through Kim H.).
I just had to make a comment about this post. I just can't believe someone would be so rude about your post. You set a goal for yourself AND accomplished it! GOOD FOR YOU!!! That is very inspiring! When anyone has a goal(graduating from college, getting married, having a baby, hitting a weightloss goal, landing a dream career, etc) and accomplishes that goal, it should be celebrated!
I have 2 kids(the youngest is 6 months) and reading your blog motivates me to keep on track because it IS possible to lose all the baby weight(only 6 more lbs to go)!
Because of my career, I am constantly reminded of how overweight our country is becoming. I do not see anything wrong with you wanting to be healthy! More children need a healthy example in their home. If mommy and daddy are not eating right and getting some form of exercise, how will the kids ever form those healthy habits??
There are 3 kinds of people in the world...
1. Those who make things happen.
2. Those who watch what happen.
3. And those who ask "what happened?"
You are 'making things happen'. If others want to join you in your healthy lifestyle, they need to stop being critical of your success. They should, instead, take note of your hardwork and possibly try to do the same. If not, they will be left asking "what happened? how did I get this overweight?"
As Joyce Meyer says, "If the devil isn't bothering you, then you probably aren't bothering him!"
Good for you for putting in the hardwork to reach your goal, setting a great example for your children by living a healthy lifestyle, and also inspiring other ladies as you live your life. keep up the great work!(sorry for the long comment)
I am a different "anonymous" person...but I have some thoughts about your original "weight" post too. More than worrying about your daughter in the future, I was concerned for all the other women who do read your blog NOW...because it is inevitable they could very likely compare themselves to you. Ones that are heavier might feel discouragement and be down on themselves. Ones that don't work out as much might feel lazy compared to your efforts. If they haven't lost their baby weight, if they don't get up at 5 am and go to the gym...Etc. Women have real trouble not comparing themselves to others and feeling happy and content with where they are at personally. (And I'm not talking about me...I've had kids and am in great shape now too).
I think it is great to be fit, and be excited and happy about that being something that you have been successful at. And I agree, pregnancy doesn't have to/shouldn't equal permanent weight gain. And I think it is great to try to encourage others...but I don't think you went about it in a very wise way. What I mean is this: I think you could have talked about how you have worked hard and achieved your fitness and weight loss goals WITHOUT posting the exact weight you are at. This would have still been an encouragement to others to do the same. You say you were being funny, but really? I bet most women thought about the number on your scale without laughing. Yes, I know you say this is YOUR personal blog and I understand that...but the fact is that others are affected by it too. Not just you. So I just think you should consider that when you write. I also think your intensity for this subject makes it seem like your body and weight are a little too important. And I'd hate for that to spread to someone else as well.
Finally, I think posts about this stuff (weight and body size) by women are kind of obnoxious. Whether someone is complaining about it or bragging about it. It's already a way too overly important issue to too many as it is. I think people should just be where they are and work toward their goals and be a little more quiet about it. And if you ARE doing a good job and it shows, then when the people who know you see how fit you actually are after having babies - you won't have to blog about it to be an encouragement. You'll be an inspiration just from the how obvious it is that you have gotten back in shape.
i also stumble upon your blog awhile ago.. i find you honest and refreshing and found that post inspiring and not at all offensive. i like that you are honest and real and don't try to hide your insecurities and convey that you are "perfect" or have the "perfect life." this seems to be so controversial and i am surprised! it is your blog,and you can say or document whatever the heck you want!
ANYWAYS.. how do you get your blog made into a book? what company or site do you go through, and does it come out well? i would like to do the same with mine.
-laura m
i think you're awesome for writing such an honest blog about your experience as a woman who is a wife and mother...It seems inevitable with blogs like yours that become popular among folks who don't always know you in real life (like me, though we have talked several times and you are incredibly sweet!)that something rubs someone the wrong way and these controversies come up. I always hate to watch it happen because I know it just stinks to be attacked, especially anonymously and especially about your mothering! I just hope that you keep on keeping it real on here, girl.
My general thoughts on the topic at hand are:
1. To answer one of anonymous' original questions--is this what you really want your daughter to think is important? Um, I think yeah. I think you do want her to think it's important to stay healthy which is what most of the blog was about. It is clear that health and fitness are values of yours and I think you are fine to want to pass that on. Are we seriously so pc now that we can't say it's a good thing to encourage good health?! Also, you have made it abundantly clear you're stressing other important aspects of life for your kids, like Jesus. Yes, you have!
2. It seems the scale photo was what rubbed people the wrong way and that just reeks of everyone's 'own issues' (as anonymous, Beth, made clear in her second comment). I think that if you weigh your goal weight (whether it is 115 or 150) seven months after having a baby and have worked hard to get there in a healthy way that you should post that weight on there JUST TO GET PRAISE! But that's just me. I think any issues folks have with you reaching your goal weight and telling the world are theirs, not yours.
3. This is such a sensitive issue for women and girls and women who are moms of girls. Thank you for talking about it. Really, I think Reese has got a really great role model in you, specifically in this area.
Praying for some peace for you, girl!
I'm sure you don't need one more person putting in their two cents, but I have to admit it did strike me as an interesting thing to do. The difficult thing about blogging is that it is put out there, for anyone to read, for anyone to comment on. Intention and tone are often missed. I think, if anything, it's a caution to consider how something may come across. Weight is a sensitive issue for many women, and I would agree with the other anonymous post that perhaps a better way to approach it would be tips, helpful hints, and a general post of how you're doing with baby weight loss. And may I suggest that perhaps some of your reaction was a realization that it wasn't the best way to do it. Do not dismiss Beth as someone who is sassy. Use it as an opportunity to grow.
Wow, Nicki! I loved your original post, and I love the introspective conversation it has inspired. Sure, as someone who has struggled with weight my whole life, it is hard for me to see you weighing that number, which I could NEVER weigh even if I wasn't overweight. (Because I'm like what, 6 inches taller than you?) But anybody who knows you even a tiny bit would NEVER think you are stressing the importance of that specific number or trying to make anybody feel bad about themselves. You are nothing but an encourager, and that is OBVIOUSLY the intention of your original post. You worked hard, you met a goal, you proved to all of us who have that baby weight to lose that IT CAN BE DONE, and you deserve to be able to celebrate that victory in your life. Those of us who are your friends joyfully celebrate with you. :)
Hi. Thanks for commenting on my blog. I have loved reading yours. I think our babies are only a couple of days apart.
I can totally relate to your weight post. I am a mother of 3 and with the youngest being only 7 months, I still feel like I have a LONG ways to go. I have always gotten the weight off with the other pregnancies. So, I am not that concerned with this one. But, it has definitely taken longer, this time around. I don't know if it is b/c its a 3rd baby or b/c of age. I can just tell a REALLY big difference. I wish I lived closer so I could take your class. Have a great rest of the week!!!
OK. I totally didn't read any of your comments before I wrote that last one. So, I came back to add, that I so wish that I was brave enough to post my own weight. You are one rock star momma. You have every right to post that picture, b/c of how HARD you worked to get where you are!!!! So...you go girl!!! Keep it up!!! Seeing that scale makes me want to take a pic of my number on my own scale so I can strive to work harder at where I want to be!!! Thank you!!!! :)
I am Brent, Nicki's husband, and I appreciate her body...really appreciate it if you know what I mean.
BDUB
I think that this is your blog and if people are offended, they simply should stop reading it. And it is SO cowardly to post anonymously. I think that's way worse than anything you could possibly post. You are precious and your children are absolutely adorable!
I just wanted to say that your last post helped me get my little rear-end in gear. Knowing my little Tristan is just a couple of months older than REW, it was a good encouragement to me that I needed to get back in the game and start exercising again. Because of you, I've started jogging again every other day! Yeah! It hurts but so glad I'm back to it again! For the one you offend out there, you encourage dozens more! Love your honesty girl, keep it coming!
Sorry you are having to read everyones two cents on your own blog. Keep on being you and a great mama!!
Wow, I'm a little late in all this, but I just have to say that I think Anon is taking things a bit too seriously and it sounds as thought it is his/her issues and not yours. First, I think everybody has a particular weight number that they feel is healthy...with your experience with exercise and healthy eating, I have no doubt that your particular number is right for you. No matter what, though, it's still your blog to post whatever you choose!! You do not have to generalize just to make someone else feel better about themselves. I, for one, appreciate your honesty for telling us the hardwork it took to get back down to your prepregnancy weight, as it is reassuring for me after I have my baby that I can work hard, too, and reach my goal. To Anon: If you are having such issues as you expressed, then it seems you should ask yourself what is causing these issues within you. Otherwise, just don't read a blog you find offensive. Problem solved.
(Whew! And now I'll step down off my soapbox..... ;)
Oh my goodness!! Thanks to all of this "controversy" I got my entertainment for the day!!! I'm not going to say anything so that when you decide to go private with your blog, I'll still be invited to read it!! :) I loved Brent's comment but the way. That's funny!
Oh my goodness, Brent is hilarious! So good seeing you and the kiddos this morning!
I have read your blog a few times and honestly, I was a little shocked over this post, too. I agree a lot with what Beth and other Anons have said. As a friend of a friend, I don't know you well. It also seems as though you have a good number of blog followers or readers and I would suspect that many don't know you very well, either. They may not know that you are petite (as one of your friends said) and that 115 lbs is "normal" for you. A little explanation could have helped before you rushed to judge "anonymous".
I'm not saying that my reaction to this post has nothing to do with my own weight issues, but what woman does not have weight issues?
As a woman of God who has an audience (referring to your number of blog followers) do you not have a responsibility to make sure you are encouraging as opposed to "showing off"? Obviously, your post had that affect on some people. It may not have been your intention, but it happened. Instead of judging "Beth", maybe you should just take into account a bit of what she said?
WHOA WHOA WHOA! Ya'll!!! I had no idea this would resonate so deeply with some people. I feel the need to respond, though clearly, I can't respond to all--I will try to touch on some things...
I first want to say thank you to 'Beth' (she is the original "anonymous" gangsta!) for apologizing for critizing my mothering skills. That was big of you to come forth and I appreciate it. I don't know if I know you, or not, but I am sure you meant no harm. Apparently you are not the only one who took offense. I forgive and hope you are still a reader of my blog.
Secondly, thank everyone who posted something nice to say! I was really feeling bad and misunderstood and you all made my day! I loved hearing that some of you were encouraged (which was truly and deeply my intent)! I look so forward to hearing about your weight loss and fitness goals. There is NOTHING wrong with wanting a healthy, fit body pre or post baby! I am cheering for all of you! xoxoxoxo
Ah, and lastly. To all the haters. Some with names and some who remain nameless,
I think you are all upset about something I have done. A common theme seems to be the actual number on the scale. Sorry for that. You know, I am truly a smurf-sized person and 115 is a healthy weight for me. I assure you, 150 pounds (where I was at the end of REW's pregnancy) is not for someone of my stature!!!! I perhaps should have prefaced that, but I did not realize the stir it would cause. If I had it to do all over, I would not post the picture. Still, I wonder if you would still have a problem with me just saying I have reached a weight loss goal? Maybe and maybe not. I don't think this has anything to do with me being a "woman of God...'showing off'" sadly, that is not the case. I think you all forgot the part of the post where I said, my body is not the same as it was but I still love it!!! I am FITTER than I ever have been, but thay does not mean I look like a model or like I did when I was 18. Trust, breastfeeding has done a number on the "gals" and there is some cellulite-age underneath the other "gal", but I still feel great! I think I made it clear in my post, but I know you probably can't read the way I would SAY something like that. On the screen as you see it, it is what it is, and however you choose to interperet it is the way it comes across to you! That's ok. If I wanted to, I suppose I could block all "anonymous" comments. I know having a blog means not everyone has to agree. I just wish you all did not attack my character. That is upsetting to me.
And to anyone else out there:
YOUR body is your body! Our bodies are not the same. There are different sizes and shapes. Not everyone needs to be the "number" that I am at! I wish I had never made ANYONE feel that way. I will say it again: it is good to workout and be healthy. It is ok to set goals...infact, it is a MUST. Find out a healthy weight for YOU and get work at it!
I just love love love sharing all the shanagans in my life. I have always been open with all of you. About most things. I am flawed. I care about my weight. Maybe I work out more than others and I am sorry if it bothers you, but that is a part of my life!! I really do thank everyone for commenting. I am still going to "keep it real" on here. I may post other oboxious pictures, but you have a choice whether or not you decide to read.
I am just here to share life (good and bad)
Love to all,
xoxo
Nic
Disclaimer: I have not posted anything before, but am the husband of a friend who reads your blog. I could not agree more with Zoe; even if you think you are right, teachability and humility are two hallmarks of Christianity and it is a virtue to consider what you can learn from others' input. Blowing it off as "judgmental" or "sassy" when someone provides substantive input is immature and short-sighted. Agree there are ways to encourage without providing all of the specifics of what you have "accomplished." Do not agree that you blog only for your records or you would not publish it (or would only invite your family). Finally, if you think the degree to which you focus on your body and weight will not affect your children, you are dead wrong. Last, I would encourage you to use this opportunity to internalize some possibly useful perspective. 1 Timothy 4:8 ("Physical exercise is of limited value, but Godliness is very dear, a pledge of life, both there and here.")
ok. please...enough with the negative stuff. husband of a friend of a friend of whomever, are you really going to start giving me scripture? please, just don't read my blog if it bothers you. the extent you are taking this is really creeping me out.
Wait a second people! My original comment said nothing about Nicki being a bad mother or Christian. That is not in question here. Her blog proves that she is a woman of strong faith and character and that she is very loving. So, drop that! My post was merely to draw attention to the pressure that may be added when in, say fifteen years, her daughter reads through the blog book. There is so much influence out there about weight as it is. I was just worried that Nicki may not have thought about how REW may interpret the things she had said here. If it is so possible for many of us adults to misinterpret what she meant, it could be very easy for a child or teenager to do the same. I am ALL for healthy living! ALL kids should be encouraged to exercise and eat right. I just think we as parents have to be very careful about HOW we choose to talk (write) about these issues. Case closed people, leave it alone! It was meant to be constructive and actually provided a wake-up call to me as well about how I want to discuss these issues with my kids.
Hey husband of a friend who reads my wife's blog. I have a suggestion for you. Quit talking trash to my wife. She does not need some dude talking smack about her motherhood or faith on her blog. If you have a mans problem, post your name, and let me be present at your discussion with my wife. Otherwise, back off.
Brent
husband of friend....semi-anonymously calling out another man's wife in a public forum is what seems a bit immature and short sighted to me, frankly.
nice, however, to see nicki's husband stand up for his woman!
I think intent matters. I'm pretty sure Nikki just wanted to encourage and inspire here.
Her daughter should be PROUD of her mother and her accomplishment, and it will likely inspire her.
The Wilsons are raising their children to see themselves in God's eyes, not by a measure on a scale, so I think there's little risk that her daughter won't feel she "measures up" or whatever the complaint was.
It is a public blog and complaints/criticisms are a part of every public forum. So long as everyone takes the high road, it can be very constructive.
Nikki has expressed her intent, apologized to all offended, and I think we should leave her be on this issue.
I have stumbled upon your blog in the past and have a daughter who struggled with pregnancy weight! We have enjoyed your blog and loved your honesty about your body image as a pregnant woman. However, posting a picture of the scales was a bit shocking to us both. You could have easily said you had gained 35 pounds and lost it all in six months. I think most women would feel comfortable putting information like that down, but actually posting the picture of your weight, while I'm sure you didn't mean to come across as prideful, certainly did to several people. You are right that this is your personal blog, and lots of women desire to get their bodies back after pregnancy. However, there are just as many of them who do not and have lots of emotions to deal with because of it. Not to mention the changing hormones of new mommies. I applaud your efforts in getting down to a goal weight, but your response to the first "anonymous" about being sassy and judgmental could easily send out another message about you that I don't think you want to send. YOu seem to be a genuinely kind-hearted person, and one who I wouldn't question their mothering skills. Somehow posting a picture of a scale, no matter what it says seems a bit taboo. I'm not going to quote scripture or try to come across as sassy, but you touched on a very personal and sensitive subject for most women who are very private about their weight. I'm glad you reached your goal, but am sorry that achieving the goal and discussing it didn't have quite the positive impact that it could have.
Nic,
As you know, I've been following these comments since you warned me of them yesterday and I'm truthfully shocked at what some people feel appropriate to say about you and their thoughts in reguards to your blog. Especially if they don't know your true character- or for that matter, know you.
I almost think this entire issue has gone too far and that if what you write or share is too much or too critical or boastful in people's opinion, they shouldn't waste their time reading. I, personally, love you and your blog!
I wasn't going to say anything, but I wanted to share with you that reguardless of what others think, I appreciate your desire to be fit and trim and feel good for yourself, your children and your husband. You really are an inspiration to me. And because I know you, I know your heart in the original post. Your desire to document, reward yourself for a job well done (because I know how much EVEN YOU have to work at getting your weight back down), and just be yourself on your blog!
In fact, the 5 am work out routines you created with me, allowed me a time in my life when I've felt the best about my weight, my shape and my appearance. You never once pushed me to be a certain size or number and even when you were six months pregnant and weighed the same as me :)(18 months out of pregnancy and busting my butt with your program) you encouraged me, reassured me and always made me feel like I was producing results. You never assumed I should be your size or your weight. I know that's not your desire.
You have been such a wonderful friend and a true inspiration of how to take care of yourself and to feel great about the amazing characteristics God has given us as women.
Thank you for always being honest. Thank you for having high standards for yourself and in turn, inspiring me to be even better.
I will be honest... I'm dreading returning to your intense workouts after Griffin makes his arrival, but I'm looking forward to our early mornings together & the way your exercise knowledge helps me feel better about myself.
You are a treasure!
Nicki, I applaud you for your hard work. I am amazed at all of the comments that have been left, wow people if it bothers you don't read it. Aren't we all allowed to have different opinions...so you don't agree with how she chose to share all of her hard work. She did, so move on. I for one wish that I have reached a goal such as that to share it with others. It is hard work to lose weight, so it should be celebrated, however Nicki chooses. I want my daughters to know that health and taking care of yourself doesn't just happen, it is something that has to be worked at. So Nicki, congratulations on your hard work it is to be celebrated however YOU chose...it encouraged me to get my act together and make it more of a priority not just for me but to teach my kids the importance of taking care of our bodies. Nicki, it's your blog so PLEASE continue to share your heart, celebrations and funny sotries.
nicki -
thank you for sharing your honesty and hard work of getting off pregnancy weight. sorry that you have had to have some people say really mean things to you. i am encouraged and inspired - having my little one 4 weeks ago to be okay with getting up early and getting the weight off again. i totally agree with all of your points of how to do it and find that a supportive husband is a big deal in finding the time to workout. anyway - thanks for being honest, don't worry about what other people say - and realize that if they don't like it - they don't have to read your blog. (no one is making them)
anyway - strong work and thanks for being open and vulnerable.
also - i like how brent responded to the people as well!
Go girl!
Nicki
I found your blog through a friends and read it constantly. My husband and I do not have any kids yet and your blog has truly opened my eyeness to the beauty of having little ones.
As a woman who would someday love to have children, I applaud your honesty about life...the good and bad.
Just from reading your blog, I can tell you are a woman of great character, great faith, and great mothership (I don't think that is a word!)
Thank you for already inspiring those of us who do not have children!
Amanda
Here's my thought. Weight comes down to confidence. Confidence comes from the Lord only, not from a scale and not from work outs, not from dress sizes and not from weight loss. So if you are struggling with weight are you also struggling (I'm not talking trying to lose weight, I'm talking major lack of confidence) in your walk with the Lord? The times I don't struggle with weight are the times I feel fulfilled and complete in Him and He spurs me on to take care of his temple.
I loved your scale post, although, I wish it was in color so I could make sure you didn't need a pedicure because B would need a phone call! Just kidding. Back to my train of thought. We are friends, not the closest, but sisters in Christ and friends. I loved your honesty and I know you enough to know that you are a cheerleader for all people with all issues, not just about weight loss and health and fitness. You are a true encourager and I think your picture was also meant to encourage you for when the next baby comes or the next mountain to be climbed arrives-you know that you can do it because you've documented it. What people don't see on their computer screen is that your heart is so full of love and your intentions are pure. Keep on posting honestly...REW (and T too-we already know B is) will be proud of her mama. The people that really matter are those that are man (or woman) enough to come to you privately and converse about their issue with your post. The anonymous posts, while very entertaining, don't matter! (But they would hurt my feelings too!)
what ever happened to the old saying, "if you dont have anything nice to say, dont say it at all"? people, if you dont like something she said on her blog- dont read it. you clearly DO NOT know her. give me a break- dont you have anything better to do with your time. seriously! find something to do!
actually, laura, the REASON it was in b&w was because i was in desperate need of a pedi!!! call the hubs for me, will ya?
Nikki, I saw your comment on Chalene's blog and I had to come and see what all the fuss was about! Just ignore all the bad comments. I can tell you, as a person who is in the process of losing weight, your post did not discourage me or make me feel bad about myself. Rather, it encouraged me and let me know that there is hope (and that you had to work hard too!) Just because you worked hard at losing weight does not mean that you are giving your daughter a negative body image, or that you're a bad christian! I, for one, hope you do not make your blog private, because if your blog was private I would never have gotten to read it!
WELL DONE
Nicki~
First I want to say, I have NEVER commented on someone else’s blog that I do not know personally, until now. I am a good friend of Holly J’s, and I’m sure she’s mentioned how I … well I’ll just say it.. LOVE stalking you and Kinsey’s blogs! :) At first I enjoyed yours, only to get a glimpse of all Holly’s new friends and new activities..but since, have thoroughly enjoyed keeping of with The Wilson’s, esp. your precious Mug and REW!
With that said, I have been contemplating whether or not I should comment on this issue, but something just keeps sucking me in. So, here goes.. I have no post-baby weight, seeing as how I haven’t had any children yet, but coming from someone who has put on some major lbs, in the past couple of years, when I first read your “weight” post, I must admit, I too chuckled at your 115!! UNTIL..I quickly came to the realization that I was reading YOUR blog, and YOUR truth! I am BLOWN AWAY at the absolute ridiculous comments that all these “anonymous’s” have felt compelled to share. The nerve of these people amaze me. “I felt”, “I thought”, “I think” WHO CARES, what “they” thought!! This is YOUR blog, and nowhere on your post did I see you write, “please share with me your concerns on my weight, my mothering skills, how you FELT about what I wrote, how I could have written my post better to YOUR liking, or better yet, your thoughts on what I had for breakfast this morning!!”
I sincerely hope this “incident” hasn’t permanently changed your views on what you write in YOUR blog. There is NO need to apologize for what YOU wrote! I’d personally love to see a pic of 114, 113, 112, 111.. ;) Thanks for your honesty, Thanks for your creative hosting ideas, Thanks for your unwavering walks with God, Thanks for your great fashion sense, Thanks for your awesome choices in music, Christian and Lady GaGa, ;) Thanks for your Easter’s with Dou, Thanks for your fantastic child tips to new mothers now and in the future, Thanks for you being YOU!
Looking forward to many more posts from Nicksterland!!
Nicki, I hope you don't find my comment offensive this time, I was really just trying to stick up for you. Anyway, just remember this quote when people are trying to tell you it's not okay to share your successes because it might make someone else feel bad.
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
-Marianne Williamson
YOU ROCK!!! Your post inspired me to get my lazy behind off the sofa and go workout!
AMEN SISTER!!!
I have been out of the "blog world" for a while...so I am WAY BEHIND...but I must say...YOU GO GIRL!!!
First and foremost...YOU are an INSPIRATION...for all those mommies who want to "get back in shape and get closer to their prebaby shape".
NEVER let any of the negative comments get you down, girl...and KNOW that you are inspiring to women...most of all for your LOVE OF OUR LORD...and then also for your encouragement on the "workout" subject!!!
KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK!!!
TO ALL ANNYONMENY POSTERS (ESPICALL THE HIUSBAND OF TE FRIEND) I too am a husband of a friend, my name is Isaac. As a husband of a friend who was overweight as a kid and got made fun of for it would have loved to have had a mom like Nicki that encouraged healthy eating and exercise. As a husband of a friend I love that my wife is smaller now than she was before she had our son, and I too enjoy her body very much, yes Brent I do know what you mean. Also Husband of a friend…Don’t use scripture after disrespecting and degrading one of Gods precious daughters, you give us all a bad name.
oh isaac shiel! that comment has got me in stitches with laughter! i miss you and kate and we will be visiting and pawning our child off on you next week!
xoxo
I found your blog a while back and check in from time to time. I just wanted to mention that after reading your post last Wednesday it encouraged me to get out and start working out again to try to lose some of my post baby weight from my first. I also want to be in better shape should I be blessed with another pregnancy. I didn't see anything wrong with your post and just wanted to say thanks for kicking my butt back in gear. If I lived near you I'd love to come to some of your classes. Anyway, love your blog. Thanks for keepin' it real.
Hey Nic!!
I read your original post and then the "anonymous comment" and your response. Then, I wasn't on the blog for a couple of days and I come back to an EXPLOSION of opinions! Well, not one to be left out (lol), I had to share my own. When I saw the pic of your 115 ell-bees, I had a few responses...1.) made me start planning how I was going to start working out again...2.) made me start thinking about how I need to be in the BEST shape possible BEFORE I get preggers as it will be much easier to lose it afterwards...3.) You MUST be a smurf (j/k, but I already knew from your other pics you were a tiny little thang!),.
And also, I find that people who are very insecure with both themselves and don't know themselves as a child of God, are the first to criticize. For some it is easier to be jealous and hateful, than to be truly happy for others.
God has called you to be an inspiration to others. this is one of His gifts to you. He wouldn't give you a desire and passion, if He didn't want you to use it to glorify Him!
If people who do not know you, choose to assume your intent was negative, that's their problem!
You have an awesome hubby, two fabulous kiddos, and a Father who loves you SOOO much...plus some bloggy friends who think you're pretty cool, too!
Keep that chin up and don't give this nonsense another thought! YOu know who you are!!!
Love ya, girl!
Oh my goodness! I am still struggling with losing my baby weight- 2 yrs later! but ur weight post did not bother me a bit. i have lost almost 30lbs & still want to lose another 10-15 to be at my goal weight but i cant get it off. i dont know why 115 lbs. would be offensive.. i would look anorexic at that weight bc i am so tall. some ppl just wait for things like this to come along so they can tag others on it.
i know it is much easier said than done- but dont pay any attention to those haters! they are obviously having more problems in their lives than u would want to know about!
kudos to u for getting to ur goal- that must feel AWESOME!!!!!!!
Nicki - Just wanted to give you a little more support on this issue. I found your blog through Corrie's and love checking in on you because I am also a fitness professional. I think I've commented here before...
Anyhow, I totally "got" the original intent of your post. I don't know you in real life, but was able to discern that you are petite in nature, and therefor 115 is feasible for you (though not for everyone). I was also able to tell that it was truly meant to be a MOTIVATIONAL post rather than a LOOK-AT-ME, bragging type post.
I think those who are CHOOSING to be offended over this issue could very well choose not to be as well. It's their problem, not yours.
You are a rock star.
Hi Nic,
I stumbled upon your blog through Chalene's blog. (Avid TurboJammer and ChaLEAN Extremist, here ;)
After reading most of these comments, I have so much to say, but will try to narrow it down to only this:
I am 5'1". I had my son when I was 22 yrs old and gained 50 lbs! 20 lbs fell right off as soon as he was born, but I had to WORK HARD to lose the excess 30---which took 8 mos, btw. My reasons for losing the weight was vanity. Yes, I'll say it. I wanted to look good in my clothes!
I am now 45 yrs old. Being so short, and coming from a family that is generally overweight, (some being obese), I have had to work VERY hard my entire life to stay in shape. I hated the gym so I did/do all of my aerobics and weight training at home. My husband is a cyclist---that's his "thang".
However, as I grew older and matured, my PRIMARY reasons for staying in shape changed. Yes, I still want to look good in my clothes, let's be honest here, but more than anything I want to be healthy and strong! I have watched six (6!) people on my husband's side of the family die too soon due to health issues from poor eating habits and a sedentary lifestyle. Very, very, sad.
Some of the comments regarding the example you're setting for your daughter compelled me to share this:
My son left home for college in 2005. During this time, I discovered he was VERY careful about the foods he was putting into his body. I paid his food bills and noticed he very seldom ever ate at a fast food restaurant. (A college student!) And would make passing comments about "not eating that junk". I also learned he got a gym membership on campus right away---and he used it. He said he "wasn't playing high school sports anymore so how would he get his exercise?" (ok!)
He graduated this year and still eats a healthy diet and (again) renewed his gym membership. He's 6-ft tall and has always been "naturally" slim---it's not like he "needs" it to lose weight. But he realizes he does need to take care of the body God gave him.
It NEVER, EVER, occurred to me that my son was watching my husband and I as he was growing up! We never preached the importance of eating right and exercising. We just did it, because, that's what we did. And apparently, he was paying attention!
How do you think it makes me feel knowing, (all things being equal), I won't have to worry about my son having health problems due to a poor diet and lack of exercise?
I hope your daughter watches you and I hope she watches VERY, VERY closely! She will grow up and as a young adult she will have been trained to take care of herself, to be healthy!
Be proud. Be very, very, proud of your accomplishments!
P.S. We, too, are a Christian family. As I am sure you well know, MOST importantly, our children are observing our spiritual "walk", as well. Our son has grown up to be a fine Christian young man who loves God and serves God. Be that example. They're watching you! :)
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